i was wrong.........!!

i wanna changed
to be a better human being
i wanna changed my routine
i wanna changed my thoughts
i wanna change my best friend

i dont wanna talk trash
i dont wanna be rubbish
i dont wanna smell foul
i dont wanna to get burned...

im not gonna waste a second
im not gonna be ordinary
i wanna be someone that contribute this true way...

i was wrong before
i was dragged and been astrayed
i was blind even in a shinny day

its time turn..
no turning back anymore..
not any more!!!

kuzminki park...cantik rupenyeee..

its been 5 days off starting from 20 to 25 april in conjunction with Hitler's buffday...okeh laa..meh cite skit why we were quarentined during those days in russia..actually budak2 moscow je dapat cuti sb katenye during Hitler's buffday,russian especially skin head will lingering around to beat foreigners..they could kill and do whatever that may coz temporary or permanent or boring pain..

5 hari cuti dok lam bilik memang la bosan bangat walaupun minggu tu kene prepare for pharmaco exam tapi takkan the whole day nak kene bace buku kan..?so,i made a plan to lepak kat kuzminki park kat hostel kiteorg ni ha..just 2 minutes walk je sebenarnye tapi i never know that there's a big awesome park behind the hostel...walamak..memang cun la tempat nih..its a russian park..so extraordinary..natural n peace..cantiknye ciptaan Allah ni kan..

park ni sgt la besar...it looks like urmmm jungle tapi bukan cam utan belantare yang kat malaysia tu yg dipenuhi dgn binatang buas tapi die ala2 utan yang comel2 tu...tgk pic kat atas..
mase round2 ngn wan ngn azmin kat lam park nih kiteorg saling la memberi pendapat tentang alam ciptaan Illahi ni...kiteorg mentadabbur alam la lebih kurang...kan Allah ader cakap dalam Al-Quran supaya kita berjalan di bumi ini dan memperhatikan kebesaranNya agar dapat diambil pengajaran...

salah satu bende yang saye dapt ialah..apabila saye perhatikan pokok2 yang yang tumbuh terdapat perbezaan diantara mereka walaupun pokok2 ini dari spesies yang sama,mendapat quantiti siraman air hujan yang sama,menyerap kapasiti sinaran cahaya matahari yang sama dan nutrient dari tanah yang sama...pokok2 ini akhirnya membesar dengan kadar yang berbeza, ader yang berdaun lebat,ader yang "botak",ade yang tinggi dan ader yang rendah,ader yang berwarne coklat,ader yang warnenye kekuningan dan ader jgak ala nak merah akan warnenye...

cube kita relatekan dengan kehidupan kita seharian...dunia sekarang ini sudah berjaya menarik anak2 muda islam supaya jauh daripada ajaran agama..kita disibukkan dengan ideology2 barat, hedonism, technology,meterialism,pangkat dan kedudukan...kalau kita mengikut analogy pokok2 itu tadi,kita mampu menjadi manusia yang berbeza walaupun kita dibawah naungan payung jahiliah...iaitu manusia yang menunaikan shahadatnya bukan hanya sekadar memperbaharuinya dengan lisan setiap 5 kali waktu solat...manusia yang setia taat pada perintah tuhannya walaupan perbuatannya dianggap asing, pelik atau ntah pape bagi org lain....(kirenye cam tak modern la kan kalau warak sgt)...tapi siapakah yang rugi dan siapakah yang pelik?

dalam mengaplikasi analogy pokok2 tu in my life in moscow is....i become a better muslim and devoted myself to islam better than i did before when i was in malaysia...maknenye kat sini even the surrounding is not islamic becoz here are almost christian, i can feel that i am different and special..kalo dok lam train bile penoh yang russian rase cam kecik je diri nih...memang la physically tapi rase macam syukor sgt2 sebab dalam jutaan manusia ni, i was selected, i was given an opportunity to embrace islam...THANK YOU ALLAH...

sesungguhnya islam itu datang dan pergi dalam keadaan asing..so,be the alien!!!

mari mentadabbur.....

assalamualaikum....


Dah lame saye tak tulis blog..been busy lately..lots of things to revise and study..

Hurmmm...i juz wanna share about one of this surah that i've learn in my usrah..surah An-Nas..
i 100% sure that most of muslim have this in their memory cells...dari kecil kite diajar suruh menghafal surah ni kan? but do u really understand what does it means and wat Allah is trying to tell us about this surah?

Okeh..jom kite tengok skit ape yg tersirat dalam surah ni...

Surah ni adalah surah terakhir dalam al-Quran,iaitu surah yg ke 114 dan mengandungi 6 ayat...

maksud :

1-katakanlah,ak berlindung kepada tuhannya manusia...
2-Raja manusia
3-sembahan manusia
4-dari kejahatan bisikan syaitan yang bersembunyi
5-yang membisikkan ke dalam dada manusia
6-dari golongan jin dan manusia..


Syaitan musuh ketat umat islam sb dieorang sanggup masuk nerake sebab tak mahu sujud kat Adam a.s..die akan menghasut kite supaye kite ikut bersame die masuk ke nerake sb syaitan taknak masuk nerake sorang2...jahatnye syaitan ni kan?

Walaupun kite tak pernah tengok nerake pon macam syaitan,kite tahu betape dasyatnye siksaan dan azab kubur...so,how to get rid off syaitan so that we can get rid off hell?

Hurmmm...cube tengok surah an-nas ni...semuanye telah diterangkan,cume kita sahaje yang mahu ikut atau taknak...dari ayat pertama lagi Allah dah sebut agar ingatlah Aku yang :

ar-Rab -yang memelihara
malikkin Nas - yang berkuasa menentukan dan mengambil tindakkan
illahinnas - yang maha tinggi,unggul dan berkuasa

Sekarang ni kita tahu yang syaitan itu adalah dibawah kawalan kekuasaan Allah...sesiapa yang takutkan Allah dan banyak mengingatiNya,maka takutlah syaitan padanya....contoh satu cerita Imam Ghazali ketika ada seseorang yang meminta pertolongannya untuk merawat orang yang dirasut,ketika itu beliau sedang mengajar didalam kelas...Imam Ghazali menyatakan yang dia tidak dapat hadir pada waktu itu kerana tugasnya dan menyuruh agar orang itu membawa pulang terompah beliau...Alhamdulliah ketika syaitan melihat terompah Imam Ghazali,syaitan itu lari dari merasut tubuh si fulan...kesimpulan nye disini ialah...syaitan takut pada orang yang takutkan Allah seperti Imam Ghazali walaupun hanya pada terompahnya....so,banyak lah berzikir,membaca Al-Quran,mengahadiri majlis ilmu dan beristighfar...


Sesungguhnya Allah itu tidak kejam...Die tahu manusia adalah insan yang lemah yang mempunyai nafsu dan syahwat...dengan itu,janganlah kita menggunakan alasan ini sebagai satu jalan keluar untuk melakukan maksiat....malah signifikannya disini ialah segeralah bertaubat apabila kita tersedar daripada melakukan kejahatn..kerana hidayah itu hanya diberi Allah pada insan yang terpilih sahaja...rahmat Allah besar nilainya kalau nak dibandingkan dengan amalan kita....

sebenarnya syaitan ni hanya membisikkan saje kat hati kita untuk berbuat jahat tapi die sendiri tak sanggup nak lihat maksiat yang kita buat sebab die tahu azab neraka yang pedih apabila ingkar perintah Allah...jadi,kita tak boleh salahkan syaitan 100% sebab yang buat tu adalah diri kita,syaitan cume bagi opinion je...hihhiih...kita ader akal,pikir la baik buruk bende yang kita buat tu....hurmmm...syaitan ni pulak ader jugak dari kalangan manusia dan jin....
syaitan dari manusia ni boleh jadi kawan kita, adik beradik kita, parents or sape2 je...maksudnye apabila manusia mengajak kita amal mungkar nahi makruf....maka,mereka ni sedikit sebanyak membantu meringankan tugas syaitan untuk menjauhkan kita dari islam...maka tergolonglah golongan ini dalam golongan syaitan....so,pandailah pilih kawan dan saling menasihati antara satu sama lain agar kita semua tak termsuk dalam golongan syaitan....

journey to turkey...

First of all..WOW!!!
turkey is the must be visited country that u ever dream....
i spent about 7 days in turkey(21-27 january09) covering most fascinating spots in istanbul and cappodokia...they were awesome!!

We landed at Halimavaani Antatuk Airport,took van coz 10 lira each(RM20) to our hostel (cordial hostel) located at sultan ahmed region..istanbul looks alot like KL...but its alittle bit chilly...about the hostel,it offered very reasonable price which it cost only 8 euro for nite..plus they are very concerned bout hygiene...but it is not spotless...of course..! it took only 5 minutes walk to blue mosque and haghia sofya,8 minutes to underground cistern,10 minutes to topkapi palace,15 minutes to grand bazaar and 2 minutes walk to tram rail which can connect u to other places u wish..

where to enjoy some turkish food with low price??
hurmm...pick restaurant which u think they didn't flow out so much cash to rent the stall...that was what we think...one thing i hate most when taking a stroll around the city is the turks love to shout out loud ur country name and ask everything whch is boring..like Hello...malaysia? i love Malaysia...how r u?u want to buy somthing??very good price fo u Malaysia...
ohhhhh...whatever...!! i can't bear it when having some shopping in grand bazaar....owh..sorry..i shud talk about food..if u want to have some fish,take train to Eminonu and drop there.. ask people around to the fish restaurant...u can see them grilling fish on the boats..the waiters wear a black uniform with gold colored embroider..kind of cool...hihihi..for me,the food didn't fit my taste buds...anyway..if u are in rush..u just can grab any kebab and eat when walking...if u can't help urself from stop chewing,u can buy some baked nuts and grilled corn along your way..

hurmm...where to go next?
topkapi palace...ticket coz 20 lira(RM40)it is a castle which store many historical things..it is a primary residence of ottoman sultans 1465 to 1853...it is a must visited place bcoz there u can see many precious things abandoned by our last prophet Muhammad and his friends..(swords,beard,tooth,caftan,letters and many more)..there is also Mose's rod,John's skull an his hand,Fatimah zahra's caftan....all togeteher this palace consist of 4 yards..it takes 3 hours for meaningful tour...
blue mosque which is free...built with 6 minarets by Sultan Ahmed..as a tradition,the sultan will build a building(free style) if they win any battle during their reign but this mosque has been built by sultan Ahmed was not base on his victory. Instead he never won any war he was in charged during his time...
Dalmabache palace...coz 20 lira to get in..it is a palace built after topkapi..just take 15 minutes by train from sultan ahmed to karbatas(final)..drop off and walk for 5 minutes..nice and magnificient..
Yerebatan sarayi(underground cistern) coz 10 lira each..it is a water store underground cistern was built in the 6th century during the reign of Byzantine emperor Justinian 1...u can see medusa head upside down there too...anyway,it was nice but the fare is unagreeable..
Haghia sofya...huhuhu..so expensive to get in..20 lira for the ticket for u to enter the church and the mosque at the same time...there is a combination of Islam and Christian holy worship place..there u can see the Allah , Muhammad caliggraphy in Khat and also the pictures of Mary and Jesus Christ on the wall...it was a church during constantinopole rule(eastern orthodox) which has been converted into a mosque by the Sultan Mehmed 2(the conqueror) whch better known as Sultan Fatih...but nowaday,it turns out as a museum under the command of mustafa kemal Antartuk(the modern pharoah)...
as a muslim,i suggest u to pay a visit to Eyub Sultan mosque..there u can see Ayub an-anshari's tomb...it is free..u can also pray there...Ayub was a friend of Muhammad(pbuh)..he had an attempt to authorise and conquer constantinopole before Sultan Fatih but the victory was not on his side..once Sultan Fatih brought an end to Byzantine emperor,he asked his men to find the lost tomb of Ayub...when they discovered,his body was not all buried..he left his foot revealed..Sultan ordered his men to kiss Ayub's foot to pay reverence for him but when the sultan's turn had come,Ayub pulled his foot back into the ground...he was ashamed of Sultan because he failed to take down the contantinopole..i belive it is a true story..

what to shop?
turkish carpet,apple tea,turkish delight(variety flavors u can find),turkish coffee(too coffee),turquiose which means turk stone,ceramik with turk traditional designs with different indication of each emperor and many more....they were so exquisite and u have to be aware with the price they offered because they love to cheat on our money....especially tourist..hence,u better survey before u decide to take it home...

where to shop?
grand bazaar for turkish things,spice bazaar and for modern shopping u can try Cavehir mall located at sisli region...some say that it is biggest mall in europe...it is true that for me only the area involved to build this mall is huge but the shops available is too limited..many brandy shops are not there as instance Esprit,Nike,D&G,Padini,Elle,Naf naf,......plus small topshop!!kind of boring...

Cappadokia....
it is a cave area...there u can see many cave houses built by ancient people for shelter hiding away from roman cruelty..it is amazing when im start to think of how determined were they to carve the hard stone into a house...i also saw many mountains with snow covered on its top... it was so beautiful....here u cannot lose a chance to spent ur nite in cave hotel...alittle bit chilly but u can bear it...

thats all my words about turkeye...tashakur(TQ)

HATERS written by alisa valdes rodriguez

Mean girls..do you ever watch this movie starring by lindsay lohan?im quite sure many of you guys have watched it..anyway,i bought this book during ma summer break at MPH (times Square). the novel entitled as mentioned above..anyway,i would like to share ma point of views and maybe comments bout this novel..this story is quite similar with the mean girls movie..

Anyway...the story begin with this girl name Pasquala Rumalda Quintana de Archuleta (fuhh..gasping) a New Mexican girl whose parents got divorced...her dad is a cartoonist and her mom had left them,looking for another guys to hanging out without give a damn bout her family... Pasqi(her nickname) loves to bike and taking down many mountains in Taos..

One day,her dad had been offered by a company in Southern California to widened his career.. his ideas has been selected to be broadcasted..i dont know..!!dont bother bcoz this story is not bout him..

From the first day at her new southern California high school(Padre Loma High school),Pasqi learns that the popular students may be diverse in ethnicity but are alike in their cruelty...the environment is absolutely different back home in Taos..everything is so well manicured and look like toys.everyone is so wicked and seems like they are paying too much attention about their good looking and money!! they r all look like a superstar on TV..but for me they r fake..(plastic surgery)..well,u know..


As usual,the story is not complete without love drama rite?whatever..!! Pasqi met one of this ultra-hot guy name Chris Cabrera..meaning that she got messed and troubled by the beautiful cruel Jessica Nguyen who is the queen of haters and she got her eyes on Pasqi...she has warned Pasqi not to flirt with Chris..or even talk to him!!

Pasqi could have a vision about sumting would happen in the future....(superstitious)..one nite,she has been invited to join the party which is mostly attended by popular students in Loma..at the party,Andrew put rape drug(not sure the name) in her soda...she has also been challenged to kiss a girl in circled crowd...STUPID!! do they think this is the coolest way of having fun??then,jessica had pushed her into the swimming pool bcoz of her attemp of taking chris from her..Come on la..there are thousand of men out there laa Nguyen..!!

At the end of the story...tadaaa!!its not fair for you if i reveal its ending rite guys?? well, i think u can guess...anyway,this story is not bad but i keep questioning..wat am i questioning ha??

1. are these girls go to school seeking for ultra hot boys and be famous??
2.like in the mean girl movie..they just carry their tiny handbeg under the armpit loaded with
make up and things..wat about books??maybe they have locker at school..hurmmm.. at least
make it more logic...dont think u make movies just to promote new brandy stuff!!
3.why r girls always talking about boys??
4.why teenagers nowadays show no respect to their parents?? Is it a symptom that happen in
US which may influenced the other kids in this universe??why do they always say the bad
things about their parents and never agree with their decision??
5.is it the correct figure of the girl in US lost their virginity at the average age of 16??
6.why people keep calling other people as loser?

Actually those question pop out in ma mind when reading this novel..i hate the way Pasqi keep blaming her dad action..keep saying that he looks stupid and the bad moment is spending time with her dad..this has become the normal phenomenon in our daily life..

For the readers,please dont try this at home..!! practice the good moral values and keep out the bad influence from this story..take them as a lesson..

my rating : 4 stars...

WHY HIJAB???

What do you think about hijab?..im quite sure when we talk about hijab,your imagination will switch on into the muslim woman who cover their hair,neck,chest and maybe all part of the body..that is what the most apparent thing that differentiate muslim from non-muslim woman..

I am a muslim girl who use to study in moscow which most of the population loaded with christian...anyway,islam is the second religion in this country but most of them seems like not well practicing..the muslim girls in here are less to see wearing hijab,hence,i cannot notice whether she is a muslim or not unless if she mention that she is also muslim like i am...because only hijab can make them different,i mean physically..

For the first time i stepped my foot in moscow,it seems like everybody give us a strenght kind of looks at us..it hacked me off actually..they would gaze at me like i was a genome or something and then lean in to their friends to whisper about their thoughts on me..i mean bad and humiliating thoughts..then,their friend join to stare at us with such ignorance smirks..i felt like i just want to jump off the train and get away from this communist country...i just wondering whether they do have manners to interact with people indirectly.We cannot value a person just by taking a swift glance of him or her..this is all absurd!!

Btw,I always used to keep in my heart and brain that im leading to the right path.i 100% believe of my way to Him(Allah)..i should not bother or even feel ignorance about their reaction to me..because they do not know why my religion taught me so..i cover my body as a hedge to my dignity and honour..it does not belong to me and i have no rights to cause any harms to it,to modify it, and to expose it to those who has no permit to see it..i dont want to be submissive and be slave to the men..western always have a thought that we are the one who in veiled are being oppressed,but if u try to analyse it wisely...u will found out who is in the reality are being exploited by men or being oppressed ..look at those advertisement,voluptous chicks with sexy and luring body exposing all parts of the "sensitive spots"are used to be displayed on the massive electronic board,as a model of car promotion (i was bewildered once when i see this car promotion poster when the model is 4 times larger than the car is) ,slaves of fashions,slaves in playboys or other magazines that makes boys gone wild like animals nowadays..whats the points of all these? To feed the insatiable men? As a normal and civilized people,we know who are now being oppressed!!


In Al-Quran,there are many verses that stated all the women believers to cover up..


“O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks (veils) all over their bodies (i.e. screen themselves completely except the eyes or one eye to see the way). That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women) so as not to be annoyed. And Allaah is Ever Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful”

[al-Ahzaab 33:59]

Prophet Muhammad once said...when a girl reach the ages of puberty,all parts of the body should not be seen but not this--he was pointing to the palms and the face.

Before, i end up my writting..i would to comment one of this video which was made in Cairo,Egypt by the western about why there is still sexual harassment has been reported among the egyption girls eventhough they are covered???in my point of view..things weren't gone in that way if all people practicing the whole islam teaching..men got aroused when they saw women in tv,magazines and from the other sources (foreign sources) and what they'll do is harass the girls(veiled) around him who are not resposible for it...who are not responsible for the arousement...so,who start all this over?

Think about it...Islam is the best and truth religion..!! Hijab is a part of its teaching which bring a lot of changes that upgrade the women status and liberation..if u do explore Islam,u gonna find out more incedible things and insyaAllah, may God bring u the lights....peace be upon you..

p/s:take a look at the foods and think with your heart..?


CHOICES GIVEN..WHICH ONE WILL YOU PREFERRED?

Happy Belated Birthday to me...

THE BIGGEST CARD EVER HAVE...

MY LOVELY CACTUS...IT LOOKS
BEAUTIFUL BUT IT HURTS

MY LITTLE MR.RHINO..
IT DOES LOOK STRONG BUT....
IT IS TAME...LOOK AT HIS BIG EYES..






I was born on the 5 january 1988....
Today i am 21 years and 4 days old...hurmmm

wat?!! mak ayah..ur daughter is old enuff.....meaning that u r old too mom and dad..hehehe

everywhere i've been i always be the oldest in my group or ma batch...huhuuhuu

but still my face doesnt look like im the oldest..glad for that..maybe bcoz i am petite..

Before i get mumbling too much and got lost..i would like to thank to all ma beloved friends who always be nice to me..who will be there when i ask their favor(share every moment we had)...that wat frens means ya...?

Hurmmm..wanna know wat i got this year for buffday?

Ok..i love all of them but i was so touched with one of this card...the biggest card i ever have..it was made by ma rummate..she got it prepared very delicate and seems it needs alot of patience....that was so touchy..thank you and i love it very much...

Isma and zap gave me a very thorny(hihihi) cactus....i know where they got this little beautiful cactus...kedai tepi jalan tu kan?kat bus stop..i knew it...

for me the cactus represent obstacles and challenges...life is like a wheel..sumtime u up and sumtime u down...all u need to do wherever and whatever situation u are in,we need to go back to our Lord..Allah..He put me a cactus(obstacles) along my path,it doesnt mean He wants to freak me out or burden me but He wants me to learn how to get over it...He wants to test my faith in Him..(that wat we call as hikmah rite?)..same goes to my daily life...i have to face 30 minutes traffic congestion to metro everyday to class..which supposed to take only 5 minutes..!! at first,i keep blaming the destiny and wat God has made for me..but then,i feel sumting that He wants me to figure out behind all these mess...maybe He wants me to keep up ma zikir(praise) to Him..maybe before this i did so little zikir...i can read mathurah or Al-Quran in the bus on the way to class...it is for me and myself...not for Him..He does not lose anything if i refuse to do so rite?

Thanks god!!

Hurmm...Fida and Fein gave me a RHINO..!!! huhuuu..im not kidding..yeah..it is a rhino..small tiny little mr. rhino...rhino show me strenght in it..i need to be braver becoz im a big little girl has become...maybe i need to find my mr.rite as strong as mr.rhino..owh..what am i talking about....?!rubbish..(hehhehehe)...

Saadah gave me a litttle mr.(?) i dont know wat it is called...but i want to name it Vilin..i copied it from ma ID doctor's name(VILIN VILINEVICH) it sounds cute..;)..Isn't it?...it is so chubby like me..heheeh..love it..so cute..!!

Tya got me a bowl..wats that means anyway...maybe it encourage me alittle bit to eat..hahahha..

thanks for all of u guys...Btw,i eat alot...

This is wat isma gave me(she cried when she gave me this letter)...owh..she is so sappy...a piece of meaningful words that i'd like to share with all...

"Bacalah kitabmu,cukuplah dirimu sendiri pada hari ini sebagai penghitung atas dirimu"

I really do appreciate for what u guys did to me but all i need is the sincerity in our friendship...

Wassalam.....